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After the lights go out

​

they come out when the lights
go out

​

not because they’re brave
but because that’s when the show ends
and the real city starts breathing.

​

you and me,
we pretend we’re not animals
because we can spell words like
mortgage
and promotion
and organic.

​

but the roaches--
the roaches don’t buy the lie.
they never signed up
for “potential.”
they don’t audition
for your approval
or your little gold-star morals.

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they just survive.

​

i’ve watched them in cheap apartments
where the walls sweat
and the sink coughs up rust,
running along the baseboards
like they own the place--

​

and hell,
they do.

​

the landlord isn’t the boss.
the senator isn’t the boss.
your smiling manager
with the teeth like a game show
isn’t the boss.

​

the roach is the boss.

because the roach understands
what society keeps trying to forget:
everything breaks.
everything rots.
everyone goes hungry
if the checks stop coming.

​

in the daytime you’ll see people
in suits
with their polished shoes
and their clean hands,
talking about “values”
and “community”
and “growth,”

​

but at night
they scratch the same itch
in different ways—
they crawl through phone screens,
through bottles,
through strangers,
through the idea
that money makes you clean.

​

watch a roach long enough
and you’ll learn the truth
about progress:
it’s just a nicer kitchen
to beg in.

​

we sweep them up,
poison them,
call them filthy
like we aren’t drenched in it--

​

and still they return,
patient as debt,
quiet as shame,
unbothered by your speeches.

​

because they know
what the tired know,
what the broke know,
what the old bartender knows
at 1:15 a.m.
when the last dream tips poorly:

​

the world isn’t run by winners.
it’s run by whatever can endure
the most dark.

​

and the roach--
small, ugly, perfect--
doesn’t want your dream.
doesn’t need your myth.
doesn’t care about your future.

​

he just waits
under the fridge
through your whole shining civilization
like a joke
with legs.

​

and one night
when the power finally dies
and the city’s pretty face
slips off in the mirror—

​

you’ll hear it.

​

that soft, dry sound
of something living
moving forward
without applause.

​

© Sreedhari Desai

© 2023 by Sreedhari Desai.

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